On Wednesday, May 4th, I sent an email that changed the future course of my life...at least for right now. I emailed Michelle at the Poudre Valley Bariatric clinic. Two days later we connected by phone. She told me my insurance would cover any three of the procedures they do there. She asked if I wanted to come to an informational seminar and start the six months of pre-op diet and exercise that were required. Without talking to my husband or thinking about all the specifics, I said "yes."
On Sunday, May 8th - Mother's Day - my husband Dave and I had a fight. It was one of those fights where one person does something innocently but the other person takes it the wrong way and blows up. Well, this fight was unintentionally started by me when I ripped some bumper stickers that were pelling off the back of my Saturn. My husband saw it and just went ballistic! To be honest, I just saw stickers that were pelling. For some reason, my husband thought that I was pelling them off to spite him. Huh? Really? Seriously? But, marriage being what it is some times, that's what Dave felt even though I didn't mean to make him angry. It lead to a several hour session where we talked through some communication issues and we both told each other that we loved each other. Our fights tend to be very good therapy. Anyway, it was during this discussion that I told Dave that I was looking into weight loss surgery and that I really wanted to move forward with it. Surprisingly, he didn't immediately say no. To be honest, I think he was shocked. We talked a lot. I was honest for the first time in several years about how horrible I feel about my weight, how I feel that he treats me sometimes because of the weight, and the fact that I needed to do something because we have to think of Daniel now. Although he wants to learn more, I think Dave will be at least 80% on board by the time I have the surgery! :-)
On the Monday after Mother's Day, I confirmed appointments with the bariatric clinic to go to a seminar this Thursday (May 12th) and start my six-month diet and exercise class starting May 26th. I also needed to get my primary care physician in on it. Since I didn't have one, I looked up a female family doctor who practices just a mile away from my home. I met with Dr. Julie Hoffman yesterday and it was FABULOUS! She was very knowledgable and supportive of this step that I'm taking and agreed to be my primary care physician and walk me through the next six month of pre-op requirements. So now I will see her monthly to do a physical, lab work, and thorough documentation on the progress of my diet plan through Poudre Valley. She did a six-month rotation with the surgical team there at Poudre Valley so she understands the requirements and knows exactly what I need to do as well. WOW! I was very glad and blessed that she was the doctor I chose through the Blue-Cross/Blue-Shield website.
Over the past few days, I've been gearing up for the bariatric surgery seminar tomorrow. They will go over the three procedures they do...Lap Band, Vertical Sleeve, and Gastric Bypass. I've ruled out Lap Band now because I don't want to go through so much hassle with getting a foreign object placed in my body and having frequent office visits for adjustments. I decided that if I'm going to do this...surgery...it was going to be permanent. I want a tool that will help me get to my goal weight and stay there. So vertical sleeve and gastric bypass are at the top of the list right now. Currently, I'm favoring gastric bypass but considering vertical sleeve too. So we'll see what I finally decide later.
I ordered "Weight Loss Surgery for Dummies." It arrives today. I read some great reviews saying that it was a great resource for those considering surgery and go through it. I've also been watching tons of YouTube videos. I might vlog later in addition to blogging, but for now I'm going to stick with writing.
My current stats are: 293.8 lbs, 5' 5 1/2" tall, large frame. My BMI is 49. My body fat according to my scale is 44%. My bone mass is 7.3% (which is high - normally the bone mass of a 20 year old male). My lean body mass is around 131 pounds. Figuring a 20% body fat, my ideal weight would be 157 pounds. That's 136.8 pounds that I need to lose. My guess is that I can probably get down to 280 pounds pre-op. According to the BMI calculator, I need to be at 150 pounds to be considered "normal" and not "overweight." I'm sure that I will lose some muscle during this journey so I figure that if I land anywhere between 150 and 160, I'm golden!
So, these are my initial thoughts as I start this journey toward weight loss surgery. I am going to drop the weight forever. I hope that you'll enjoy the journey with me. I need all the support I can get.
Showing posts with label weight loss surgery. Show all posts
Showing posts with label weight loss surgery. Show all posts
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Starting the journey to weight loss surgery - Part 1
If you would have asked me two years ago if I would ever consider weight loss surgery, I would have said no. It would have been an absolute, unequivocal denial that Angela DeWispelaere would ever consider surgery to help with weight loss. And it would have been an absolute denial of the previous 30+ years of diet rollercoasting that I've done in my life. I'm the only morbidly obese person I know that has been fat since 3 years old, started their first diet officially at 8 years old, endured anorexia in high school to get the weight off, transitioned to bulimia through college and my 20s to slow the weight gain, and successfully lost over 500 pounds over the course of my life.
And of course, gained 500 pounds back...and then some.
No, I'm not 500 pounds...but some times it feels that way. And at certain times in my life I really wondered if I would be one of those pitiful women that I was scared of becoming who actually were 500 pounds.
After I had my son Daniel in January of 2010, the way I looked at my weight loss journey changed dramatically. First when I got pregnant, I was delusionally hopeful that somehow pregnancy would "reset" my hormone issues (polycystic ovarian syndrome, congenital adrenal hyperplasia, and pituitary tumors). When I became pregnant, all of a sudden I felt "normal" in terms of my appetite for the first time in my life...very ironic. I only gained 21 pounds during my pregnancy which was completely amazing and I hoped that when I delivered that the weight would come off easily, that breastfeeding would aid the weight loss, and I would magically become this thin person. Okay, yes, it was delusional - but yes, sometimes I actually thought that. Reality was that, yes, I lost the 21 pounds easily. Within two weeks I was at my pre-pregnancy weight of 288. But my dream of breastfeeding came to an abrupt halt. My hormone issues impacted my ability to produce breastmilk and I stopped pumping after one month. I started Weight Watchers 6 weeks after delivery and lost four pounds immediately and then...stopped. I would experience 1/2 pound up, 1/4 pound down, 1 pound up, 1/2 pound down. I spent weeks and weeks of this. I'd done Weight Watchers successfully many times, losing 70 pounds at least twice. But now, at 284 pounds, I wasn't losing any weight. I went back to work and started just using Weight Watchers Online but eventually the stress of going back to work impacted my ability to even track. Slowly over the course of a year, I worked my way back up to 308 pounds (eeeeeekkkkk!).
That's when I had one of those ahh moments. I was 40 years old, over my self-imposed barrier of 300 pounds, under the worst stress of my life, and desperate for something to change in my life. I'd been taking nursing classes with anticipation of entering nursing clinicals in May 2012. Through my classes, bariatric surgery had come up several times. In my classes, obesity was talked about in terms of it being a disease. For me, I still consider it a symptom of other disease but it was the first time that I took a long hard look at what would happen to me over the long-term if I didn't get the weight off. Now that I had Daniel, I knew that it was time to consider other options. In September or October of 2010, I looked into the Lap Band procedure. It was termed the least risky so I did some research, watched a lot of online videos, and started to have hope for the first time. Then I contacted the Poudre Valley Bariatric clinic and found out that my employer's insurance would not cover the procedure. At that point, I was heart-broken. I was just starting to get hope again. I decided to enter Allergan's contest for Free Lap Band surgery...but I didn't get it. So in January of 2011, I had given up hope and started on yet another weight loss program.
On January 17, my world changed. I got laid off! :-)
I smile because it was one of the best days of my life and was one event that, to date, changed everything. Fortunately in December, my husband decided to sell his business and started a new sales job. When I got laid off, we knew we would have to switch to their insurance. At the end of March, my employer's insurance ran out so we moved to my husband's insurance, Blue Cross Blue Shield.
It is now May. Ten days ago I was finishing up my Anatomy and Physiology 2 class online. We had a previous discussion during one of the units about obesity. One of my ignorant classmates made the mistake of jumping all over people who become obese and those who end up considering surgery. The student basically took the position that obese people were lazy and that surgery was the "easy way out." I wanted to reach through my computer screen and strangle her! So on Monday, May 2nd, for some odd reason I started to think about bariatric surgery again and did some research.
To hear the rest of the story, read Part 2! :-)
And of course, gained 500 pounds back...and then some.
No, I'm not 500 pounds...but some times it feels that way. And at certain times in my life I really wondered if I would be one of those pitiful women that I was scared of becoming who actually were 500 pounds.
After I had my son Daniel in January of 2010, the way I looked at my weight loss journey changed dramatically. First when I got pregnant, I was delusionally hopeful that somehow pregnancy would "reset" my hormone issues (polycystic ovarian syndrome, congenital adrenal hyperplasia, and pituitary tumors). When I became pregnant, all of a sudden I felt "normal" in terms of my appetite for the first time in my life...very ironic. I only gained 21 pounds during my pregnancy which was completely amazing and I hoped that when I delivered that the weight would come off easily, that breastfeeding would aid the weight loss, and I would magically become this thin person. Okay, yes, it was delusional - but yes, sometimes I actually thought that. Reality was that, yes, I lost the 21 pounds easily. Within two weeks I was at my pre-pregnancy weight of 288. But my dream of breastfeeding came to an abrupt halt. My hormone issues impacted my ability to produce breastmilk and I stopped pumping after one month. I started Weight Watchers 6 weeks after delivery and lost four pounds immediately and then...stopped. I would experience 1/2 pound up, 1/4 pound down, 1 pound up, 1/2 pound down. I spent weeks and weeks of this. I'd done Weight Watchers successfully many times, losing 70 pounds at least twice. But now, at 284 pounds, I wasn't losing any weight. I went back to work and started just using Weight Watchers Online but eventually the stress of going back to work impacted my ability to even track. Slowly over the course of a year, I worked my way back up to 308 pounds (eeeeeekkkkk!).
That's when I had one of those ahh moments. I was 40 years old, over my self-imposed barrier of 300 pounds, under the worst stress of my life, and desperate for something to change in my life. I'd been taking nursing classes with anticipation of entering nursing clinicals in May 2012. Through my classes, bariatric surgery had come up several times. In my classes, obesity was talked about in terms of it being a disease. For me, I still consider it a symptom of other disease but it was the first time that I took a long hard look at what would happen to me over the long-term if I didn't get the weight off. Now that I had Daniel, I knew that it was time to consider other options. In September or October of 2010, I looked into the Lap Band procedure. It was termed the least risky so I did some research, watched a lot of online videos, and started to have hope for the first time. Then I contacted the Poudre Valley Bariatric clinic and found out that my employer's insurance would not cover the procedure. At that point, I was heart-broken. I was just starting to get hope again. I decided to enter Allergan's contest for Free Lap Band surgery...but I didn't get it. So in January of 2011, I had given up hope and started on yet another weight loss program.
On January 17, my world changed. I got laid off! :-)
I smile because it was one of the best days of my life and was one event that, to date, changed everything. Fortunately in December, my husband decided to sell his business and started a new sales job. When I got laid off, we knew we would have to switch to their insurance. At the end of March, my employer's insurance ran out so we moved to my husband's insurance, Blue Cross Blue Shield.
It is now May. Ten days ago I was finishing up my Anatomy and Physiology 2 class online. We had a previous discussion during one of the units about obesity. One of my ignorant classmates made the mistake of jumping all over people who become obese and those who end up considering surgery. The student basically took the position that obese people were lazy and that surgery was the "easy way out." I wanted to reach through my computer screen and strangle her! So on Monday, May 2nd, for some odd reason I started to think about bariatric surgery again and did some research.
To hear the rest of the story, read Part 2! :-)
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