It's truly amazing sometimes all that can happen in 24 to 36 hours. Since my last post, I went to the Poudre Valley Bariatric Patient Seminar at the Harmony Campus. Sarah watched Daniel and it was nice that he was able to spend some play time with Tyler. There were only 3 people in the room when I got there. One woman named Amber was there with her husband from New Mexico. The bariatric nurses was Becky. The seminar started right at 11 a.m. and she proceeded to go through the three different types of surgeries as well as what to expect post-op. About 20 minutes in to the seminar, another gentleman in his late 50s or 60s came in. He drove from Boulder. I was the only local.
It was a really good seminar and I'm glad it was a small class. I actually knew most of the information presented and was able to give some direction to Amber about checking out YouTube.com and some Gastric Bypass websites to find out more about the surgery as well as find out more the practical living experiences of those after surgery. She was very appreciative. She was early 30s, about 350 pounds, and has Type 2 Diabetes. The older gentleman there also had diabetes. I actually felt small and pretty healthy compared to the other two.
I came away from the seminar more convinced that gastric bypass is the right choice for me. And Dave and I talked about it extensively last night when he came home from work. He was still a bit defensive, feeling that I was thinking that if I had this surgery and lost the weight that my life would be perfect. I obviously told him no. I know it won't make my life perfect. But I did tell him that it would make me feel better about myself, feel more outgoing, feel more comfortable in my own skin, and overall more happy. It lead to another marriage discussion and I knew exactly what was going on at that point. I asked him if he thought that if I lost the weight that I'd start being attracted to other guys. You know, I guess if the shoe was on the other foot I'd definitely be thinking the same thing I guess. But I told him that I'd probably be very uncomfortable when I start getting attention from other guys and that I'd need his help to get them off my back. So then I just reassured him that the reason that I was wanting to do this was for me, our marriage, our family, and most especially for Daniel. I don't want to do this for vain reasons although fitting into a normal size pair of jeans is definitely the goal - but not to attract guys - to look and feel normal. Maybe that is being a bit too simplistic but I can honestly say that I don't know what it will be like for me to be a normal size and that it is going to take some adjustments and I need my husband's love and support to go through this journey.
In the end, I told Dave that I'd like to move forward and take the 6 month nutrition class required by insurance. He said yes, that he's supporting me moving forward. It's interesting but I'm totally comfortable with some of the sacrifices I'll have to make in terms of diet and exercise. To me, it's really not a big deal. I told him I lived for three years eating extremely healthy and never going to fast food joints and I didn't miss a thing. He agreed - in the end that fast food is probably better left alone anyway. But sugar - like ice cream which he proceeded to eat it front of me - he says that he could never do it. He asked me how'd I'd feel when he was eating ice cream and I wasn't. I told him it would likely be the same as it was now - I didn't want any and didn't care that he ate it. No big deal. But I told him that reality is that I'll probably have head hunger to deal with during the journey and that I'll just have to learn to deal with it. And cravings for certain foods - we'll I'm sure I can find suitable substitutes.
After the discussion, I think we both felt better. I think he realizes how serious I'm taking this and how I've already thought about most everything that he's thinking about. I'm very happy that we had that discussion. I think Dave is more supportive now. His only concern is who will take care of me and Daniel post-op so I'm going to have to solicit some help for that. Either my mom, Laurie, or maybe even Bobbi. I'll have to talk to them about my plans closer to the Fall and ask for their support and see if the would be willing to travel to Colorado to help. I'll certainly call on our church as well. And I'm sure Sarah will help too.
Next on the agenda. Getting ready for the nutrition class and starting to prepare now for post-op. I'll need to be taking lots of vitamins afterward so I'm going to get into the habit now and then research the types that I'll need after surgery. I'll also be getting samples of protein shakes and other items I'll want to try for the post-op diet for the first couple of months when the diet is mostly liquids and soft foods. Next week I have to go to the lab to do a full blood panel for my primary care doctor. She wants to make sure we have a baseline for before surgery. Plus I have to set up an appointment with my ob/gyn and get my medical records from her as well. I need documentation that I've been morbidly obese for the last 3 to 5 years. Duh, no problem there!
Well, gonna try to organize my dressers today and maybe start on my closet. Need to get as much stuff done before my next nursing class starts in about 10 days. The class is "Nutrition in Health and Illness." A good class to do during this time I think. All things happen for a reason.
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